Motorized Cooler

You know "that guy" at the party? The one who will still be remembered ten years later when a group of friends suddenly remember that "CRAAAZEEEY NIGHT AT DAVE'S HOUSE DUDE!" and "THAT TOTALLY WASTED GUY!" before wondering whatever happened to him? Okay, you also may not live in California and use the term "DUDE" in conversation, but whether it be a complete stranger, a friend or even yourself who ends up the life and soul of the night, they're about somewhere.

You might be hoping to be that person every night or just looking for your first gateway into the party legends club, but rolling up with a motorized cooler filled of beer is guaranteed to work!

Picture the scene; everyone else is showing up by foot or in a taxi, mingling outside in the garden and complaining this night needs a good kick up the backside. Suddenly someone pulls their glass away from their mouth and says "Can anyone hear that?" As the rumbling sound gradually gets louder and louder you suddenly burst over the hill to the heroic soundtrack of a Western movie, throwing beers to your adorning fans who cheer and shower you with champagne. This all happens in epic slow motion and you spend the rest of the night being fed grapes and fanned with palm leaves.

That may be slightly delusional of myself but a man can dream. I'd assume in reality you'd get a few giggles and then spend most the evening driving around your 10x10ft patio garden, regretting spending over 2k on a vehicle that takes more effort to three-point-turn than just walking to the fridge. Not to mention the moment you accidentally crash through the fence and out onto the road you'll become a target for the police as a drunk driver.

I sound bitter, and to be honest I probably am. Looking at the motorized cooler I instantly get images of a filthy rich person having a garden party on their 3 acres of land littered with fountains and exotic tees, driving around drunk in a smoking jacket telling everyone they're the greatest person alive before crashing into the pool like a big ball of flames. That sounds like the sort of party I'd like to host. I bet Charlie Sheen already has one too.

If you are filthy rich (or Charlie Sheen) there are a few people and places making motorized scooters, although I believe it's a small business and not on a mass manufacturing scale so you might need to fish around to find one.

And in a way that makes it better. Everyone have a car or a bike, how many people have motorized coolers?!